Saturday - Third and final Yizkor at New Montefiore Cemetery posting

Mourning is both a personal and communal activity. Nobody but the mourner feels the particular loss they are grieving, but many feel or have felt something similar, and can both sympathize and empathize. I cannot get inside the head of someone who has lost a parent recently, but having lost my parents and remembering how I felt, even if the sharp pains of that moment are blunted by the passage of time I can sympathize and offer honest words of condolence. If I can bring those old feelings back and let the grief wash over me for a moment, in silence I can empathize.

When the children and their children and grandchildren of the Radomers gather at the cemetery, we let some of the pain come back but ease it with the companionship of our fellows who are all in the same place. It's not the words of the prayers that make us better, it's saying them together that allows us to put aside differences and share our humanity. 

Beginning in March 2020, many of those whose close relations and friends passed away often had to mourn with their community kept at a distance. Video chats and conferences don't compete with the warmth of a person sitting next to you, perhaps in silence.

The Jewish mourning ritual is a step by step process that begins with the burial. If it is a parent that is being mourned, the stages will take a year to complete, though most of the last 11 months the mourner has returned to their normal routine.

For a person who is Ashkenazi, toward the end of that year or later, the stone on the grave is unveiled in a brief, usually meaningful ceremony. There is a tradition among the Radomers to hold the unveiling at the Yizkor if it is near the anniversary of the person's death.

It was good to get back together. Now we all have to practice good community/public health measures to show that community and communal responsibility is a way to express personal liberty.

Here's the final group of photos I've selected. I take too many and it takes time to select and edit a posting. I am glad I can do it.

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